Is hard. For me.
Somewhere around 4:30 PM yesterday afternoon I lost my focus. And I mean I completely lost it. I found myself on a skype call with great intentions of adding value and then, bam! Focus gone. Totally.
My laptop was in my lap, and so was my iPhone. Multiple windows were open and visible on my desktop and alerts were popping up everywhere. Before I new it, I found myself slipping back into a pattern of behavior that I had committed to abandon on January 7, 2011 while hiking in the Santa Monica Mountains.
Managing Distractions Instead Of Eliminating Them
The final hike at The Ranch in Malibu contains a meditation segment that is several miles long. The guides space out the guests so we can walk alone and focus on nothing but our breathing. “I am breathing in. I am breathing out.” It sounded simple enough. Until about sixty seconds into the meditation when I found myself saying, “I am breathing out” while I was breathing in. Some random thought had bounced into my brain and I had completely lost my focus. This happened over and over as I walked. It was eye opening.
Somewhere in the middle of that meditation hike I realized that I had organized my life and work space to create the greatest possible distraction. Of course, that’s not what I labeled it. I labeled it “multitasking.” And I wore my ability to manage several tasks at once as a badge of honor. My desk was an array of computer screens, filled with open application windows. Facebook, Skype, iChat, Twitter, email, browsers, and other “essential” applications were constantly open on my screens, begging for my attention. And it slipped into my personal life as well. I was never really “there” for anyone or anything. I was in a constant state of distraction.
Before the hike ended I realized that I needed to make a drastic change. So, I came home and immediately dismantled all of the computers in my office, put them in boxes and purchased a new laptop with a smaller screen. Why? To force myself to focus on one thing at a time. While working, I committed to do the following:
- Have only one window visible on my screen at any time.
- Close email, Twitter and Facebook when not in use.
- Put my laptop to sleep during phone calls.
- Make all Skype calls full screen.
Up until yesterday afternoon at 4:30 PM, I had been fairly successful at keeping that commitment. Yesterday I failed miserably. So, to Peter Brewer and Lara Scott, I offer a sincere apology for not giving you my 100% yesterday afternoon. You deserved it and you didn’t get it. You probably noticed.
It’s so easy to slip back into old bad habits. For a few hours yesterday I got cocky. But the simple truth is this: focus is still hard for me. It may always be hard for me. I don’t manage distractions well. I need to continue to eliminate them.
Is focus hard for you too?
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photo credit: Ed Schipul
Thank you Jeff for your honesty and apology accepted with gratitude. I often find myself in the same dilemma and need to try and commit to purposefulness as I switch hats throughout the waking hours between ‘my job’ and being primary carer for my children. I sometimes find it hard being in the moment totally with either hat on and could kick myself afterwards.
Take heart, I too am someone who is easily distracted by the notion of my missing out on something if I don’t busy myself by multi-tasking myself into a corner.
I shut down open windows and email, pump up the ipod volume, grab some headphones and block it out – momentarily.
There’s something very seductive about being The One Who Can Juggle the Most Balls. Multitasking contributes to the illusion that I can not only be a Jack-of-all-trades, but a Master of them all, as well!
You hit the nail on the head. Anytime we split our attention, even for a moment, we lose focus. Focus is where we can bring intense creativity and brainpower to a solution, discussion or relationship. It’s that intensity and passion that ignites the fire that can change the world.
Multitasking = Dilution
Focus = Full Strength
Mate,
I’m humbled that you gave us some of your extremely valuable time yesterday. I’m even more humbled that you reflected on us after the event and that you’ve penned the words above.
But Champion, You don’t ever ever ever ever owe me an apology.
From time to time ‘life’ takes over all of us and seems to rolls from one distraction to the next.
You Skyped in yesterday because of your very generous nature and because you saw a Mate that might have needed a hand. I really really appreciated that. Don’t ever underestimate your value.
Without doubt, Its great to have a reality check as to what we are achieving from giving the focus we give (or allow) to distractions. I take plenty from that point.
You might enjoy reading a post that I really enjoyed from a old skinny bald mate of mine. He actually writes some really good stuff.
The post below is bookmarked and one that I shared with some family. Re-reading it helps me to make sure I’m better at being in the moment.
Enjoy!
http://www.jeffturner.info/sunrise-lesson/ 🙂
Peter, 🙂 I just read it again. It seems like such a simple lesson. And yet, I think it’s one I’m going to have to learn over and over in different ways. The “in the moment” mindset requires constant vigilance. But it has tremendous rewards.
Thank you for your kind words above. I do appreciate them. More than you know. But when I decide to join a conversation, I should decide to truly join it. I should decid to give my full attention and make a difference. If I can’t commit to that, I should probably not do it. Everyone would benefit from that.
Lots to learn. I’m looking forward to the lessons. 🙂
Lara, thank you as well. Yes, we all find ourselves there. Like you, the transition from guy at work to dad at home is often not as smooth as I’d like it to be. I’m getting better at it though. My kids have told me so. But it’s constant work. And I’ve decided to work out some of this in public. Perhaps others can benefit from a glimpse in side my head. I hope so.
Jeff, yes there is. I’ve fallen prey to that seduction too many times in my life. But it is truly an illusion. I’ve experienced the “intense creativity” you talk about. I want more of it.
Your share above stopped me in my tracks. This “constant state of distraction” is harder to shake than I would have believed just a few years ago. It’s as though the buzz from TweetDeck is permanently in my head now. I don’t manage distraction well either, but will try some of these bullet points as you take us through it publically. Rooting for you bud.
Kevin, I do about 30 minutes of yoga every morning now. I’ve done so every day since January 2. The last five minutes is a forced meditation where I just focus on breathing. It helps me get my head straight for the day. I hope to add some affirmations to that at some point, but each time I try to do it now I get distracted. I’m a long way from where I want to be. And I’m ok with that. One step at a time.
Laura Monroe sent this to me. And since I’m a Zen Habits fan, I thought I’d share it here as well.
http://zenhabits.net/focus/
Wow. Peter Brewer just suggested I should come to your blog. Glad I did. I felt like I was reading about myself. I need to make those changes too and I needed to read that tonite. Thank you.
I think we all share this common problem, we just don’t always admit it. I’m glad I could assist in any way!